I am the QUEEN

55s and Then Some

2012-01-13T10:47:00.000+05:30

http://fiftyfivefun.blogspot.com/2012/01/nine-months.html

कुछ सपने दुबारा फिर कभी नहीं दिखते...

2011-12-16T01:55:00.002+05:30

बहुत कुछ कहना था
कुछ सवाल भी थे
पर हमेशा की तरह, वक़्त कम था |
घडी भर देखना चाहा
पर नज़रों की उधेड़ बुन लगी रही
और हमेशा की तरह वक़्त कम था |
बहुत कुछ सुनना चाहती थी
कुछ महसूस भी तो करना था
पर कैसे? वक़्त कम था |
एक सदी बाद मिले,
क्या कुछ/कोई बदला था?
शायद तुम? मै?
नहीं! जो बदला था वह "हम" था |
ये सच है,
मैने सबसे ज्यादा तुम्हारी चाहत को चाहा
आज मिलन में वो सच थोडा कम था |
वही तुम, वही मै, कुछ प्यार-सा भी था
बातें भी वही
नहीं था तो शायद वो हमदम था |
हंसी भी थी
पर वो ख़ुशी नहीं
शायद समां ही कुछ नम था |
आज कुछ भी हो
कल क्या होगा
बस यही एक ग़म था |
काश छुपा पाती तुम्हे अपने ही अन्दर
फिर कभी भी कुछ कम न होता |

The morning people are different from you and me

2011-11-30T14:23:00.000+05:30

Morning people are more proactive – and therefore more successful in their professional lives — according to new research.Who is a morning person, by definition? It is someone who gets up at roughly the same time on weekdays as on weekends.

Early birds are more proactive than evening people – and so they do well in business.

They tend to get better grades in school, which gets them into better colleges, which then leads to better job opportunities. Morning people also anticipate problems and try to minimize them. They're proactive." (Not that evening people are life's losers: They're smarter and more creative, and have a better sense of humor, other studies have shown.)..phew!

The morning people were more likely to agree with statements such as "I feel in charge of making things happen" and "I spend time identifying long-range goals for myself." (In the sample, the "evening people tended to sleep two hours later on weekends.)

Can you change type? "Somewhat," Still, it can be tough, partly because half of your chronotype, as it's called, is determined by genetics. And just changing the hour you wake up may not change your inherent "morning-ness" or "evening-ness" In other words, getting up earlier will not automatically make you proactive.

Chronotypes also evolve over a person's life cycle: Teenagers are evening types; between the ages of 30 and 50, people are evenly split between morning and evening types; and people become morning types as they pass through their fifties.

The challenge for businesses is to "bring out the best from their night owls." Evening types may no longer serve as our midnight lookouts, but their intelligence, creativity, humor, and extroversion are huge potential benefits to the organization.

Source: http://www.inc.com/news/articles/2010/07/research-says-morning-people-are-more-proactive.html?nav=rel

What makes a MAN!

2011-11-26T03:50:00.001+05:30

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;

If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;

If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!

— by Rudyard Kipling

क्या करूँ...!

2011-10-22T21:34:00.000+05:30

सुना है उन्हे जन्मो के वादे नहीं पसंद,
मै रेत के किले न बनाऊं तो क्या करूँ!

फिर वही मौसम आया है सर्दी का,
मैं ख्वाबे दिल न जलाऊ तो क्या करूँ!

न कोई आहट, न दस्तक, न कोई सुराग है,
यादों से दिल न बहलाऊ तो क्या करूँ!

बीच राह में छोड़ कर उसने मुड़ के भी न देखा,
हर फ़िक्र को धुए में न उडाऊ तो क्या करूँ!

खुश है वो अपने आप में, मेरे बिना,
मैं अपने आंसू न छुपाऊ तो क्या करूँ!

न कोई गुफ्तगू, न एक मुलाकात मुझसे मंज़ूर है,
इस हुक्म को भी सर-आँखों न लगाऊ तो क्या करूँ!

Schizophrenia..

2011-10-13T01:09:00.001+05:30

Dear You,

If you’re reading this, then it means I actually worked up the courage to mail it. So, good for me. You don’t know me very well, but if you get me started I have a tendency to go on and on about how hard the writing is for me. But this, this is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to write. There is no easy way to say this so, I’ll just say it. I met someone... It was an accident. I wasn’t looking for it. It wasn’t in the make. It was the perfect storm. She said one thing and I said another. Next thing I knew, I wanted to spend the rest of my life in the middle of that conversation.

Now, there’s this feeling in my gut... She might be the one... She’s completely nuts in a way that makes me smile, highly neurotic. A great deal of maintenance required. She is you. That’s the good news. The bad is that I don’t know how to be with you right now, and it scares the shit out of me. Because I have messed up in the past. But if I am not with you right now, I have this feeling that we’ll get lost out there... It’s a big bad world full of twists and turns, and people have a way of blinking and missing the moment; the moment that could have changed everything! I don’t know what’s going on with us, and I can’t tell you why you should trust a leap of faith on the likes of me, but damn you smell good!! Like home... like that hill-top flower. And you make excellent coffee. That’s gotta count for something, right? Call me.

Unfaithfully yours,
You-Know-Who

Déjà vu

2011-10-04T23:33:00.000+05:30

Good morning LA!
In the land of lotus eaters, time plays tricks on you. One day you are dreaming, the next, your dream has become your reality. It was the best of times, if only someone had told me! Mistakes were made, hearts were broken, harsh lessons learnt. He goes on without me. While I drown myself in the sea of pointless recollections. I don't know how I got here. But here I am, rotting away in the warm California Sun. There are things I need to figure out, for their sake at least. The clock is ticking, the gap is widening. They won't always luv me- 'no matter what'.
Later!

If You Forget Me...

2011-09-13T23:59:00.000+05:30

I want you to know
one thing.

You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists,
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats
that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.

Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.

If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.

If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.

But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine.

Pablo Neruda

It is a - 'word'

2011-09-05T17:04:00.001+05:30

It is friendship, it is luv,
it can be life; death, anger, lust, hurt
Or can be a feeling, place or a person!

When the baby utters it,
the mother smiles.
It can drag you to court
or shorten up the miles.

It can fetch you marks
add weight to your personality
It can make or mar relationships
It can build or destroy nations

It makes a man-a man
It can brighten up moments,
days, years or even a lifetime
or can break one's heart
and get them in demise.

It can clear up things
making life easier and happier.

A right word- can do wonders!

Happy Teachers Day!!

"भुला नहीं पाई हूँ तुम्हे"

2011-08-27T23:59:00.001+05:30

हर दिन के शुरू होने पर,

कुछ न कुछ ऐसा हो ही जाता है,

जो याद तुम्हारी दिला जाता है,

एक बार फिर तुम्हारा मासूम सा चेहरा,

मेरी आँखों के सामने छा जाता है,

...भुला नहीं पाई हूँ तुम्हे!

ऐसा नहीं कि आंखें नम हैं,

बिछड़ने का ग़म भी शायद नहीं,

न वो तड़प, न वो जलन है,

फिर भी मिल जाने की एक आस सी है,

इसी लिए लगता है,

भुला नहीं पाई हूँ तुम्हे!

ठंडे कोहरे से भरी सुबह और रातों में,

याद आती हैं तुम्हारी सांसे,

हर ग़ज़ल के हर शेर से,

याद आती हैं तुम्हारी बातें,

आइने में क्या अपने आप को देखती हूँ!

भुला नहीं पाई हूँ तुम्हे!

शायद तुमने कभी मेरी कद्र नहीं जानी,

शायद मैं तुम्हे कभी समझ नहीं पाई,

तकदीर के आगे बस किसका चलता है!

ये जो दिल है, ये किसी की कब सुनता है!

और मैं तो खुद मन हूँ,

शायद तुम तो भुला ही चुके मुझे ,
लेकिन तब भी भुला नहीं पाई हूँ तुम्हे!

I hate love!

2011-07-14T02:26:00.000+05:30

Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it (or maybe they did!). They did something dumb one day, like smile at you, (or say something like- You mesmerize me baby!) and then your life isn't your own anymore.

Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' (or 'break free!') turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love!

Neil Gaiman

Forgiveness

2011-07-13T02:53:00.000+05:30

You cannot go around and keep a score. If you keep a score on the good things and the bad things, you'll find out that you're a very miserable person. God gave man the ability to forget, which is one of the greatest attributes you have. Because if you remember everything that's happened to you, you generally remember that which is the most unfortunate!

Today-a quarter ago.

Last words

2011-06-28T00:01:00.000+05:30

I am a fool,
a fool hopelessly in love.
So much so that
a re-emphasized break up call
makes me think
that it might be for reuniting
That every move you make,
every word you say against being together,
I understand it in the meaning
you don't intend it to be.
That when I hear your voice
after a long, real long time
my heart beats fast
in anticipation of hearing
something it waited for all this while.
The words that it craved for!
A hope that made it beat
just for this supposed day.

I believed the universe

conspires for making me have what I want.

But as always,

the reality bites!

And so today I promise,

I wont let you know

that I keep any hope; my only aid for a survival.

I wont let you know,

about my longing for you.

For you don't want to see me

and so now will become invisible too.

Yes,

I will even forget you

for your happiness!

The answer..

2011-06-27T02:05:00.000+05:30

From the movie: Before Sunrise

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0112471/

Look into my eyes, you'll see what you mean to me!

2011-06-22T03:02:00.001+05:30

A man has only one escape from his old self to see a different self in the mirror of some woman's eyes.

Clare Boothe Luce

How?

2011-06-21T20:19:00.000+05:30

Love that well which thou must leave ere long.

William Shakespeare
(Love that thing nicely which you have to leave soon. Means love that thing or person well which you must leave before long, i.e. soon.)

Is it?

2011-06-21T02:33:00.000+05:30

Whenever you give your time, you are making a sacrifice, and sacrifice is the essence of love.

Emptiness...

2011-06-20T02:12:00.000+05:30

Everyday when I wake up, it strikes me in the weirdest of places and in the strangest of ways that you are not around anymore. And believe me... it hurts!

Do you?

2011-06-19T03:52:00.000+05:30

Long after moments of closeness have passed, a part of you remains with me and warms the places your hands have touched and hastens my heart for your return.

Robert Sexton

The solution

2011-06-18T04:07:00.000+05:30

Give in to love, or live in fear.

Mimi Marquez, "Another Day", Rent

I understand... I do!

2011-06-17T01:04:00.000+05:30

Inside the heart of each and every one of us there is a longing to be understood by someone who really cares. When a person is understood, he or she can put up with almost anything in the world.

Rev Ed Hird

Extreme emotions

2011-06-16T01:46:00.000+05:30

Hot tears roll from the sides of my eyes and down my plumped cheeks, which ache from smiling and I squeeze them with my hand to stop. It occurs to me how close happiness and sadness are. So closely knitted together. Such thin line, a thread-like divide that in the midst of emotions, it trembles, blurring the territory of exact opposites. The moment is minute, like the thin thread of a spider's web that quivers under a raindrop. Here in my moment of unstoppable cheek and stomach aching laughter, as my body rolls around, my stomach clenched, all the muscles taut, my body jumps about, is racked by emotion and therefore steps ever so slightly over the mark, and into sadness. Tears of sadness gush down my cheeks as my stomach continues to shake and ache with happiness.

How quickly a moment of love was snapped away to a moment of hate. One comment to steal it all away. Of how love and war stand upon the very same foundation. How in the darkest moments, my most fearful times, when faced, became my bravest. When feeling at your weakest, you end up showing more strength, when at your lowest are suddenly lifted higher than you've ever been.

They all border one another, those opposites, and how quickly we can be altered. Despair can be altered by one simple smile offered by a stranger; confidence can become fear by the arrival of one uneasy presence; a waver on a balance beam can turn excitement into pain, in an instant. Everything is on the verge, always brimming the surface, a slight shake, a tremble sends things toppling. How similar emotions are.

How quickly such comfort with someone can shift to awkwardness. How in the very second you reach a dead end, moments when you are convinced you know exactly where you are going are altered. A realization in less than a second. A flicker and the light becomes pitch black.

I continue to stare at the ceiling, feeling lost again when only moments ago I'd been found. My answers of only minutes ago are again transformed into questions.

A veil hangs between the two opposites, a mere slip of a thing that is transparent to warn us or comfort us. You hate now but look through this veil and see possibility of love; you are sad now but look through to the other side and see happiness. Absolute composure to a complete mess- it happens so quickly, all in the blink of an eye.

Thanks for the memories
-Cecelia Ahern

Worthless?

2011-06-15T03:03:00.000+05:30

"And think not, you can direct the course of love; for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course".

Khalil Gibran

Possessed

2011-06-14T02:08:00.004+05:30

"The most precious possession that ever comes to a man in this world is a woman's heart."

Josiah G. Holland

Good morning to good night...

2011-06-13T01:12:00.001+05:30

Some day, someone will come into your life and will love you the way you always wanted.
If your someday was yesterday, learn.
If your someday is tomorrow, hope.
If your someday is today, cherish!!

:snort :snort | :roar :roar | bow bow | Hueu

2011-06-12T00:31:00.009+05:30

You're my Honeybunch, Sugarplum
Pumpy-umpy-umpkin, You're my Sweetie Pie
You're my Cuppycake, Gumdrop
Snoogum-snoogums, You're the Apple of my Eye... :)
................................................................................

And I love you so and I want you to know
That I'll always be right here
And I love to sing sweet songs to you
Because you are so dear... :(

...and then you reclined!

2011-06-11T03:05:00.000+05:30

The decision to kiss for the first time is the most crucial in any love story. It changes the relationship of two people much more strongly than even the final surrender; because this kiss already has within it that surrender.

Emil Ludwig

For no regrets...

2011-06-10T00:29:00.000+05:30

It is never too late to be what you might have been.

George Eliot

How to Save Your Own Life (1977)

2011-06-09T00:24:00.001+05:30

"Do you want me to tell you something really subversive? Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it. . . . It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don't risk everything, you risk even more".

Erica Jong in How to Save Your Own Life (1977)

You always concentrate my whole senses..

2011-06-08T23:45:00.002+05:30

"My mind has been the most discontented and restless one that ever was put into a body too small for it. I never felt my mind repose upon anything with complete and undistracted enjoyment- upon no person but you. When you are in the room my thoughts never fly out of window: you always concentrate my whole senses".

John Keats (Letters to Fanny)

Emotions...

2011-06-07T00:27:00.002+05:30

"Jealousy is a disease, love is a healthy condition. The immature mind often mistakes one for the other, or assumes that the greater the love, the greater the jealousy - in fact, they are almost incompatible; one emotion hardly leaves room for the other".

Jubal Harshaw Robert Heinlein in Stranger In A Strange Land

The reason

2011-06-06T04:13:00.000+05:30

The minute you think of giving up, think of the reason why you held on for so long...

@05/06/2009 | Friday | 7 PM

2011-06-05T23:33:00.001+05:30

"You know when you listen to music playing from another room? And you're singing along because it's a tune that you really love? When a door closes or a car passes by so you can't hear the music anymore, but you sing along anyway...then, no matter how much time passes, when you hear the music again, you're still in the exact same time with it. That's what love is like."

Waiting for the noise to pass...

...........................!!

2011-05-29T03:09:00.000+05:30

Each time I think it can't get worse,
that I've become numb and free from the curse,
But each time you prove me wrong,
and throw me farther... showing me where I belong.

Every time I think it's enough that I've cried,
the wound that run deep has probably dried,
But then with something or the other you keep digging deep
slicing my heart further into a heap.

What have I done to get this from you,

I always tried to do what you wanted me to,

loved you truly with all I had,

Just to have you by my side, I was glad.

Falling apart,
They said I was foolish and this feeling is unreal,
that one day I will realize- my life is surreal.
In a way, some moments of weakness, that did come true,
a couple of times, I did hate myself for loving you!

They said,

Distance makes the heart grow fonder and that time heals all,

Every moment I prayed that into its place, should everything fall,

Out of sight you went but from my side I didn't let go out of touch,

Seems you have moved on from your end, as much?!

Today,

I am not even part of those five-hundred odd people of your world; those few!

cause from being 'the one' I belong to that list who 'know' you,

Why can't you see, I am still the same girl, you wanted to be with for good,

I would bring back all that magic, if I could.

After doing all this hope you are happy,
As you think someone better is waiting for you, maybe.
But one day, someday, for sure you will realize it,
As for me, it is the end of life as I know it!

The new me...

2011-05-28T00:15:00.001+05:30

I belong to storms and thundering rain,
I love myself in intense pain,
I crush the ones on the ground,
I despise empathy, even its sound!
I hate the lesser mortals- humanity,
The moods I have are beyond sanity!
I stand for malicious darkness,
cause that's the way to survive in this world full of fakeness!
I am no more the one I used to be,
Filled with ruthlessness is the way to be!
Now I know exactly what to do..
for that, all thanks to you!

From 'the one'...to being part of the list..

2011-05-27T01:07:00.001+05:30

I am trying to find the right feelings to convey,
what could I possibly do to make you stay.
It is so hard to find the right words,
to make my heart be truly heard.

With one decision, I lost all I had
and I don't even have the right to get mad!??
A decision in which I had no say,
For some moments of happiness, a lifetime I have to pay.

I tried to convince, talk, explain and even fight,
But anything I do is just not right!
For you I am not the me you fell in love with,
And that's why you did what you did.

But you are the you, who had swept me off my feet,
genuine, humble, kind and oh so sweet.
In anger we say all we don't mean...
In my shoes, have you never been?!

I apologize for calling you names
I take back all rudeness and the blames
What could I do, I was in pain
needed to catch your attention at any cost, without shame!

I still believe that you are all I need,
all the roads I can imagine, to you all they lead,
I can be the person you would adore,
Try me, just once more?

Days without you

2011-05-19T00:28:00.000+05:30

Every single day
I look at your pictures
I go through the memories
The time spent together
Dream about you
I look though my window towards the road
And see you walking down towards me
I wait for your call, a message
I keep searching for a sign
That you miss me as much I miss you
My brain wants to hate you so much
But I am just not able to, heart says no!
I still long for the time when you would come to me
And all would be okay
I know you won't, or maybe...

Trying.. but just can't!

2011-05-17T21:50:00.000+05:30

Another day, another night,
I hug my pillow, without you in sight.
Without a drop of sleep in my eyes,
I lie awake, cursing the goodbyes.
My head spins round and round,
and heart aches to listen to your sound.
I wonder where you are and what you do,
are you happy being lonely,
or do you miss me too?!
Was it so difficult to be with me,
that the pain I am going through,
is something that you can't even see!
You miss me too,
but that could be just my make belief,
something I tell my heart to escape the deep grief...

You are perfect for me...

2011-05-13T22:57:00.000+05:30

Love you and miss you... :(

You make me hate love

2011-04-30T23:06:00.008+05:30

Long walks in the woods

Cute pups on the roads

Forts and castles with their majestic aura

John Lennon’s - Stand By Me

Colored glittery bangles

Slow sweet dancing

Dimpled smiling cheeks

And that fat old Santa Clause

Grey skies or rainy evenings

Umbrellas with kitty faces

Long brunette shiny hair

Movies with happy endings

Hot coffee with caramel topping

Cubs with small mustaches

Drums or anything to do with thumping

Mirrors on bed-sides

Flowers, chocolates, candles, babies, bonfires

Commitment, care, pampering

Thoughts, world, life, me and much more

You make me hate them all!

You and me...

2011-04-13T05:19:00.000+05:30

And if there is anything like it then you are my dream. You are thoughtful, charming, caring, have a purpose in life, respectful, adorable and have the strength to handle me.

The only thing I have is determination and true love for you.

Who Knew...

2010-08-27T00:03:00.001+05:30

I ran upstairs to my room

He was coming, yes!

Never been this happy!

Oh! The wall paint is wearing off

Fixed it right, painted the whole room light

Clean sheets on the bed

A poster of nine puppies

And then you arrived

Surprised I was- it made me numb

All this while I wanted this all

And now it is here

You took me in your arms and calmed me down

“It happens, sweets.”

And then those words

Which at that time I thought were in a compulsion

And I didn’t want to respond likewise

Standing on the hilltop in the woods

With the Sun so down and all dark

And you standing right behind me

Close enough to hear each other’s heartbeat

And suddenly it was all complete

And today,

You say that we haven’t been able to grow with each other

Suddenly all you can see is pain

Your fears are larger than your love for me

What happened, my dear?

Today, you know I would do it

For your happiness

Wipe it all off- clean slate

But make me believe in this

Like you did it with love- effortlessly

With the meaning of those three words together and that nod

I gave you the power to destroy me

Or to make me the happiest one alive

The choice is yours

And I trust you still

For you are next to Godliness for me

And I know you won’t need reasons

But everything will remind you

Of the hills, the pups, grey skies and craziness

Yes, you can choose not to be with me

But you can’t separate you from me… can u!

Yet, today, I am letting you go...

शायद...

2010-07-11T23:43:00.001+05:30

जो चाहो वो मिल ही जाये ये ज़रूरी तो नहीं,

हर रात के बाद सुबह फिर आये ये ज़रूरी तो नहीं|

जो दिखता है वो मुकदर है या कि नहीं,

बूंद होंठो पे गिर के प्यास भी बुझा पाए ये ज़रूरी तो नहीं|

चाँद तारे रोज़ निकलते और दिखते भी हैं,

यूँ ही कभी कोई मिले और अपना बन पाए ज़रूरी तो नहीं|

शमा के इलावा भी सुलगते हैं ग़म ज़माने में,

हर सुलगना रौशनी कर जाये ये ज़रूरी तो नहीं|

- मनु

Please?

2010-06-15T00:02:00.001+05:30

I want to be your strength

I want to be the one you can turn to at each bend

I want to be the selfless love you would cherish

I want these feelings to never perish

Can you hold me forever and never let me go

I want to be the one to whom you would never say no

I want to be the one of your guardian angels

I want to have this love without any labels

I want to be with you when you want to be alone

I want to be your haven, your home

I want to understand your deepest fears

I want to be able to wipe off all your tears

I want this all for me

But this can happen if your let us be

Is this asking for too much?

Or you can make this come true as such!

Please? :(

Haven't I...!

2010-06-14T22:10:00.002+05:30

Have you held the one you love?

With your whole world in your both hands

What feeling it is, what completeness it creates

Doesn’t matter if the universe may end then

Have you ever been touched?

Sitting somewhere far, alone

With the serenity of a mutual thought

And that want of being together

Have you felt that everything is worthless?

That each day, every moment should fast-forward

To the time when you would be together

Body and soul forever tied together

I have lived through it all

When I cried out tears of blood

And I wasn’t even aware of the reason

To stare into the mirror and curse!

Sands in hands...

2010-04-10T19:40:00.004+05:30

There is a test for everything. At each step we get tested. Love, relationships, desires, plans, success, carrier…everything gets tested. And these tests come in the form of hardships in life.

It is not easy to face these hardships or the testing times. Often we give away or give up and might do things that we would regret later when the times cool down. Or we sometimes may have the grace to learn and grow and come out of them with flying colors.

There are numerous possibilities. And things may not make sense at that time. But remember that state is temporary. We need to take a break and stop trying to make sense of that for the moment. Because the time will come itself, and it will come to you itself. The Sun will shine and you will look back and then tiniest of the thing will fall into its place. You’ll realize you were being such a fool in trying to do something that was totally beyond your control.

For now, sit back, don’t run after it. Have faith and rest assured- your time will come. Pray- ask for the strength to be able to avoid doing things that you might repent on later. Don’t judge- anyone, anything.

One can sit in front of the fire and warm their body but what about the coldness inside them! It can only go with the warmth of love. And love will and can only come when you give it. Initially, you may feel that it is going down the drain. But it is no waste. No love is ever a waste, even if not reciprocated. Each and every right thought or action that is filled with love has a reward. It is just a matter of time.

My final day comes. They are here to take me away forever. I can see them. And now I am thinking about things that I should have done but didn’t do.

I did not take him in my arms when he was vomiting blood right in front of my eyes because just moments ago we had fought.

I did not apologize to her when she cooked for me and I left the served plate for the insects because she asked me a question that hurt my ego.

I did not thank them enough, who saved my life; thinking that it was their duty.

I did not appreciate who she was because I was jealous of her being so perfect.

I did not appreciate the gifts that I received, even when they came to me without being asked for.

And now when I want to do it all… it’s over… time’s up.

Love Always...

2010-02-25T23:58:00.007+05:30

Like a cool summer shower,

Or that hill top, bright yellow flower,

You came into my life,

Like a bee in its hive.

Your dimpled smile is a lure,

And this wonderful heart so pure,

The horrible PJs that get my face straight,

And that habit of always arriving late.

The made up voice in which you sometimes sing,

The “lady” or “hellos” that you ping,

Always ordering a nine inch Subs,

The transition from pups to cubs.

The constant buzzing of office mails on your phone,

The French goatie that you have grown,

The way you convince me, the way you speak,

Mostly a geek but sometimes a freak!

The way you love, care and pamper,

And when you invade the kitchen and tamper,

You are the King I discovered as a kid,

The snoozing on phone, net and car that you did.

This is to let you know…

I love you every bit and you I adore,

And the least I promise you is my heart and my soul,

Smile, frown, think, tease or just let things be,

Or just do nothing at all…just be with me!

Love Always!

Someone Told Me – You Envy In Love

2009-12-19T21:54:00.003+05:30

I envy this wind

That blows through your hair

I envy this sun

That sees you bare

I envy this ground

That lies beneath your feet

I envy every person

That you pass by and meet

I envy the music

That you hear

I envy the clothes that you wear

I envy anything

That you touch

I envy everything

That is close to you, so much

I envy the glass

That you drink in

In envy the sheets

That you sleep in

I envy anything

That you hold

I envy every word that you told

I envy all

That belongs to you

And to tell you…

The people I envy for

Are very very few!

Love Vs Lust

2009-10-13T21:45:00.007+05:30

Finally a post on a topic that I have been contemplating on, since about a couple of months now…or may be more! And probably still would continue with that for life. As nothing convincible has come in so far and I see no hope for the future as well. The amount of study, research and talks with people around me; that has gone into this, it is way beyond any of my posts all summed up.

Love is a soul need.

On a broader level- affinity for physical and/ or mental closeness exists in both. Where they primarily differ is the readiness or degree of commitment that they withhold. By commitment one doesn’t necessarily mean putting a ring on a finger. The term is more to do with the level of assurance.

Lust is dreadfully usage based - what you lust for. Whereas love is very subject or person based- who/ what you love. Lust is ‘love for usage’. Let’s say love for money, sex, power, success, etc, is all lust because no further commitment is required and the subject or the person from whom it is derived may change.

Whereas, it’s ironic to say that love exists more in shades of grey than pure black or white. Ironic yet true! You hardly realize when you are in it. You can always bank upon that one person or thing. The name u cry out when you are in pain – because the mere sound of that name gives you ample peace and solace. Love has an element of giving into it more oriented towards the loved ones likes and dislike. While lust is a desire to obtain something. An extreme and illogical desire. We may try to rationalize it but who are we really fooling!

Today, what we see love is not what it is, but in what form it is being marketed to us. You watch a romantic movie, you learn- oh! This is the way one needs to behave, this is what one needs to say or do. You hear a love song and you say-oh! This is the way I am supposed to behave. Or this is the way your partner should behave, or whoever, your relations, your friend etc. Or you read a book and that narrates a scene and it leaves an impact on your mind. An impact that you start picturing your D day to be matching to what you read

It is an attempt to define both terms in order to understand how they are different. Trying to identify that thin line between the two. More often than not we are in a ‘thing’ that we think is love because when we are in there, we feel it that way or maybe we like to believe that it is. But once it gets over and done with and we look back, there are some things that raise some questions; the answers to which are not too pleasant.

Is it...just crying for someone when they are away?

Is it...thinking about them all the time...relating each instance to them?

No matter what you do…you can’t seem to stop imagining..What would they do at this time?

Yes

What’s love?

A kind of attraction for each other and a feeling of caring for the person?

You care.

It’s the most divine of all feelings.

You care for someone other than you- a sort after trait in humans.

But then it is filled with all kinds of other human feelings; likes of possessiveness, attachment and what not- it sometimes gets painful.

But that doesn’t mean that love is to be blamed! It’s just pure. It’s we who could not make up to it.

Some interesting quotes that somehow impress me and make me think and believe in it!

Don’t rush in luv for it never runs out. Let luv be the one to knock at your door, so by the time you start to fall, you know that your feeling is for sure.

When you love someone, it's nothing. When someone loves you, it's something. When you luv someone & they luv you back, it's everything.

Love isn't a decision, it's a feeling. If we could decide who to love, then, life would be much simpler, but then less magical.

Never waste an opportunity 2 say 'I love U' to someone u really like, coz it is not everyday u'll meet the person who has the magic to let u fall in love.

'I Trust You' is a better compliment than 'I Love You' because you may not always trust the person you love but you can always love the person you trust.

To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love. In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness.

The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost.

Love is just a word until you find someone to give it a definition.

With a zillion love songs (from ‘what’s Love got to do with it’ to ‘Nothing’s gonna change my love for you’), movies (from ‘Love aajkal’ to ‘The Ugly Truth’), books, researches, experiences, instances, heartbreaks, greeting cards, pictures and what nots, I still stand where I started from. All I could maximum infer is that- ‘L’ove and ‘L’ust both have a same beginning but it’s the ending that marks a difference (yeah- literal and figurative).

What Is It…Confusion?

2009-05-24T18:17:00.004+05:30

It will happen that is supposed to be

No matter how much you avoid him

No matter how much you ignore

He will come and invade your heart

Like walking along the waves, on shore

Ya, that easily!

It will happen that is supposed to be

No matter how much you be ‘just friends’

No matter how much you try to keep distance

Everywhere you see, it’s him

Even in places where he is not supposed to be

Like the girls hostel’s library!

It will happen that is supposed to be

You say ‘it’s not love’, 'He is not my type'

‘He doesn’t even own a bike’

But deep down inside you know

He gets you high even when you feel extremely low

The time spent together may be less to measure

But every moment of it I will always treasure!

You Seem…Different!

2009-05-16T17:56:00.002+05:30

Everybody looks at bright stars
But you gaze at me
They like the sand on the beach
But you like my tanned skin
All hear the symphonies
But you listen to me
Lots love cloudless nights
But your hands stroke my hair
Everyone moves with day and night
But you walk with me
They like the colours of sunset
But you feel it in my eyes
The crowds thrill to see it pass by
But you wanna have me all
Sometimes I wonder why this obsession
Cuz we are humans after all
Other times I ask you why this obsession
But your lips on mine, before that, fall!

It’s a long drive baby…

2009-05-11T23:52:00.004+05:30

There is something about driving and drivers. Maybe it started in my philosophical head with the age old saying- “Life is a long drive…towards your ultimate destination.” So the way you drive, the way you shift gears…in fact even the way you hold the gear knob…all translates to what you really are in your life as well.

I like people who are chilled out at the wheel. Who hold the gear with an ease. Maybe sometimes just shift it while holding the rod and not the traditional way with the knob. Observing anything and everything around me has been a hobby. I have seen drivers ranging from a degree where one hand is on the horn and the other resting on the window and one foot on the accelerator and the other resting boldly; to the ones who would not drive but float you (I kind of admire such drivers). Who would make you feel like the government is doing a wonderful job at managing the infrastructure, by managing to avoid all the ditches and breakers on the road and will do that so effortlessly and charmingly. Then there are those who are interested in the events on the roadsides more than the lady crossing the road right in front of the car. Yeah! Have been in that too! There are some who are close to perfect. I mean, like they will be smooth, manage to talk to the fellow passengers while estimating the change of a traffic signal from go to stop and also slow down or stop if required (and not by pass) a pedestrian and not because it was some gorgeous babe but irrespective of who it was. It goes down to even- how much you love your car. Not because of how expensive it is but because it has a face. We hat I mean by that is you feel what it feels. I don’t mean that you get paranoid to the extent of the cliché- kissing your car a goodnight. But at least imagine the expression on its face when you try to drive it on a pedestrian-type-road on your left in order to get to the front of the rest of the traffic which is waiting for a red light to turn green. Of course, not forgetting how dangerous and unlawful it is.

In the present times of road rage and transformation of driving per say being converted to extended working hours, it’s become almost impossible to relish the seat behind the wheel. It becomes evident from what we see every day on the road when we travel to and fro from office. One car per person. Or if two- it’s the driver. As I have seen the other side of the world too, the country side I mean, where a person knows the other fellow drivers, maybe not by names or designations or offices, but may be by the style in which they say a gracious greeting to each other. Be it by the style of the horn or the number of seconds for which their headlights flashes.

And what’s with the woman drivers. If what I stated all this were to hold true what would it imply for us?! That we live our lives dangerously? Or slowly? This is something that I have never been able to figure out.

Drive safe…drive willingly.

I was Tagged

2009-05-11T11:10:00.003+05:30

This was really difficult and so took me so long to finally get the tag off. On one hand where I could not come up with the best three choices from a dozen of my favorites, on the other, there were categories where I don’t really favor any particular brand. And , really, I am not too much of a brand person. As long as I like something, it’s good for me, no matter what stamp it carries on it.

But all in all, it was a good exercise, required some introspection.

Three Favorite Actors
Amitabh Bachchan, Shahrukh Khan, Aamir Khan

Three Favorite Actresses
Kareena Kapoor, Kajol, Kangana Ranaut

Three Favorite New Stars (Bollywood)
Ranbeer Kapoor, Abhay Deol

Three Favorite Sports
Volleyball, Basketball, Cricket

Three Favorite Sportspersons
David Bekham, MS Dhoni

Three Favorite Politicians

None

Three Favorite Comedians
Russell Peters, Raju Srivastava

Three Favorite Indian Male singers

Sonu Nigam, Mohit Chauhan, Kishore Kumar

Three Favorite Indian Female singers
Sunidhi Chauhan, Alisha Chiai, Shriya Ghoshal

Three Favorite Corporate Honchos
Warren Buffet (Seriously…can’t think of more)

Three Favorite News channels
(Thought a lot about it…but all news channels are crap)

Three Favorite News anchors
:-D

Three Favorite Hindi Entertainment channels
No TV

Three Favorite English entertainment channels
No TV

Three Favorite TV Shows
Gossip Girl, The Big Bang Theory, FRIENDS

Favorite Writers
(Random)

Three Favorite Movies
Die Hard 4, Kaho Na Pyaar Hai, Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham ( I know...I know)

Three Favorite Indian Holiday destinations
Goa, Leh, Scotland

Three Favorite Professions
Radio Host, Rock Star, Personal Stylist

Three Favorite Mobile Brands
Nokia (Yeah, that’s all)

Three Favorite Laptop Brands
Macbook, Dell, HP

Three Favorite Cars

BMW Z4, Honda Pilot, Maruti

Three Favorite Apparel brands
(Believe in streetwear)

Three Favorite Deserts
Jalebi, Chocolate Pyramids, Gudh

Three Favorite Cuisines
Indian (That’s all I CAN have)

I hate to do this but as the tradition goes- I tag Shabd, Abhishek, Khandu and Roohani.

But who appreciates ‘enough’…everybody wants more!

2009-03-05T15:39:00.002+05:30

It’s past midnight. But it’s not just the night that has passed. A lot has gone by. I look back- why haven’t I been a regular here lately? This is more of a rhetoric than a real question. Every morning a stranger smiles at you, your dog comes running to you, your would-be sends you an sms, a friend asks you out for a coffee, your cousin calls you up from Cheltenham, a net-pal pings you on your messenger. You ask why? No body wants to know how sad you are. In fact, no body really wants to know how you are. I read somewhere-‘A bore is a person who truly replies to the question-how are you?’ Haven’t you noticed the change in language? Now no more does one need an answer to a “Sup?” The perfect respond to that is by the same question in return “Sup?” rather an imitation! Have we all really become so selfish and self centered! Is it just me or do you feel this heat too?

Every time I prepare to post something here and the same question worries me. Does anyone really even care? How is someone supposed to find interest in something I myself really don’t like to revise! There was a time when I used to keep a pen and paper handy-you could never tell when a great thought might strike, moving towards a masterpiece! Time couldn’t changed me, it seems. Always trying to fly against the wind, I like to listen more than speak. It could be a result of always being pointed out a critic. Whenever one utters a possibility, the opposite comes to my mind. But before getting out of my mouth, always vetted with rationality, logic and facts. And sometimes emotions too, of course!

So much to say- the writer (though I don’t consider myself that in the least) inside me seems to be dying or changing into a listener may be. Because, I see, today everybody has an opinion which they think is correct. And I don’t judge that. But what we lack is the receiver- somebody who can listen/ read. He doesn’t always have to agree or disagree with everything. Else this chaos will never settle. Sometimes just listening is enough. One doesn’t have to do something always. Sometimes just being there-to fall onto…is enough.

Why? Why? Why?

2009-01-22T18:03:00.001+05:30

Why in the world should we follow some rules?
Every time we should follow anyone like fools!
You start a voyage blindly
With someone in the lead
And at the end you found
This isn’t what you need!
And if from the mob
One has the courage to move alone
You call him abnormal
You think he is ‘thrown’!
But mind you, he is not
And how could he be a discarded piece
When he can in a different direction see
Of course, it’s just one from the masses
Who raises his voice
Which is different from other people’s noise
Then you say why some people
Enjoy some special rights
Cause they are ‘different’
They are not ‘just bright’
Uniqueness is appreciated by all
One who is unique
Well, in the world could
Touch the highest peak
So be different
Let the world be hell
Or just don’t be anything
Just be yourself!

Some Crave For Love, Some For...

2009-01-22T17:48:00.002+05:30

Days passed within a blink of time
Craving for you just made me blind
I overlooked the wonderful people beside me
‘cause I just think of ‘your’ company
Every little instance I related to you
The people I did not compare you with, were very few
I wonder what you do
And am sometimes worried
The good memories that we share
You might have them buried
What fault are they at?
These innocent faces
Why should they be mistreated by torturous paces?
Mind you, too long forbidden is worse than gone!
If I leave you, will you keep on going on?

Straight From My Heart

2009-01-22T17:38:00.002+05:30

Though I never want
But as the time demands
I bid a farewell to you with joined hands

Soon I’ll be around you – no more.
I’ll surely miss you-
As the one I always adore
Do forgive me my sweetheart
If unknowingly I hurt you in anyway
‘May you always get the Best’ - I’ll always pray
One thing that makes me feel good inside
Is that I’m leaving you with the love of your life

Wash me off completely from your eyes and mind
‘Cuz you should never stop and look behind

And for me, I don’t say
Life would be ‘easy’ without you
I know I’ll have a hard time
But then the thought of
You being happy with your love
Will pacify me too.

And my dear
You have given my wonderful memories for a lifetime
The thought of every little thing concerning you
Will help me keep alive!

One thing I’d love you to do is
Consider me away from the herd
As someone closest to your heart
That would be more than enough
To let me exist.

To My Best Friend

2009-01-20T15:42:00.001+05:30

Allow me to hold your hand
So you know I’m there
Sit right beside you, gaze at you
And breathe your surrounding air
Let me just stroke your hair
And soothe away your worries
Give you a healing touch
Like cute little cupid fairies
Just talk to me
And let out all you want
Drain away the creases on your forehead
And put them in my hands
I promise to stand by you
Even when you go through hell
I’ll lend you advice, a shoulder, a hand anytime
Provided you come to me and TELL!

Now And Forever!

2008-11-24T17:18:00.002+05:30

When the sky was covered with clouds
And the wind sand aloud
I wish you were with me
To warm me and accompany

When there was bright sunshine
And the weather was really fine
I wish you were with me
To hold me and accompany

When there was continuous rain
And I was in deadly pain
I wish you were with me
To console me and accompany

Whatever the conditions maybe
Best or worse, it could be
I wish you were with me
Now and…forever!

Finally

2008-11-24T17:13:00.004+05:30

Nearer we are coming
Nearer as can
As the shadows pass by
With every blink of my eye
I see you nearer and clearer
It seems like a dream
With every second
We are covering a thousand miles
With the blitz of the wind
Time flies with the light
After centuries of being apart
With you every second in my heart
The pain that was caused
Is finally doing to depart
Holding you close and tight
In my arms
Will wash away the pain
After centuries of being apart
We’ll be ‘one’
Once again!

How Could It Be True

2008-11-24T17:07:00.002+05:30

From the window of my room I see something
But the flowered apple trees make it vague
Yet I know it is something eternal
At first I lay back in my bed
Trying to avoid the trouble
The trouble of curiosity
But it seems like that thing won’t go out of my mind
I go back to my window
And try to focus again
There it was
Same as it was
As serene as ever
I try to step back
But something pulls…
How can a thing be so killing?
Yet so serene?
“No more!” - I think
I rush through the stairs,
The corridors and veranda
Into the courtyard
Now too late to realize
What I was doing
Standing quite close
Yet too far
To a thing that was like a blink
One step – I see those eyes
With the coolness of blizzards
And calmness of oceans
Another step – I see that hair
With the darkness of night
And softness of clouds
Another one – I see that smile
With the flash of thunder
And brightness of the sun
How could it be true
I was standing next to …you!

Bheege bheege armaano ki rahad hai..

2008-11-11T16:36:00.003+05:30

It’s strange that how as time passes by and your one and/or the other desires keep fulfilling, new ones come up. Very conveniently we call it- growth. And here I am not just talking about the materialistic bliss, even in relationships. First you wanted just a nice looking girl to hang out with. Then she also has to understand, have patience, know how to cook, take your tantrums, be a yes man…and the list keeps building on.

They say- keep aspiring for something bigger something better. Because if you settled for what you have now- you will miss on what is next in line. What I don’t understand is that how long is it supposed to go? A wise man once told me- “It’ll always be like that Divya! You’ll be at an airport waiting for your flight and there you’ll see a board reading ‘Go there-it’s better there’, the choice is totally in your hands. Listen to your heart and do what it says. But once you decide- don’t leave any place for any regret to build in”.

So what I do now is whenever a doubt creeps up in my mind, if I am mad at someone, unhappy about having a small car, disappointed that my date didn’t go the way I planned- I remember that first day, that initial time- the day that I first met that someone and what all she did for me till today, the day when that key to my small car (which was my Ferrari then) was placed in my hand, the day when I was unwell and that lavish dinner date was turned into a maggie prepared totally by him.
Believe you me- I feel blessed.

Bye for now!

2008-10-04T10:26:00.002+05:30

If we could hear one anothers' prayers, God might be relieved of some of his burdens.

2008-08-10T10:39:00.003+05:30

What is written wihtout effort is in general read without pleasure.

[Happy Reading... ;-)]

2008-08-04T16:18:00.005+05:30

If a small thing has the power to make you angry, does that not indicate about your size?

[...and I am size zero...lol!]

But I luv winters...

2008-06-23T13:59:00.001+05:30

The evening was warm. The chill had said its hasta-la-vista. People were out for walks. Small groups of women chit-chatting while their dogs sniffed each other. I seemed to have missed on a lot of life! Was it just the winter setting off or something inside me was getting the warmth too?! I lit a small fire in a tasla- no, not that the coldness inside me desired for more fire. This real fire was to burn some old account statements- things that were complete and some unsettled. Papers torn into the smallest bits were catching fire as though waiting since ages to get sati. Life has been lovely since a few days. A lot has been happening. I have started to sense the numerous lives around me-the holy souls. It is said that if you leant something, you try and it doesn’t work in spite of the plenteous efforts, even after giving in everything that was possible- the only solution is to unlearn it and then learn another way.

And I am half way through this two step procedure!

Smile…

I've Learnt...

2008-06-17T10:46:00.003+05:30

I've learnt that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in... ;o)

I've learnt that no matter how much I care, some people are just a**h****.

I've learnt that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

I've learnt that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more screwed up than you think.

I've learnt that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished.

I've learnt that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.

I've learnt that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is atfirst, the passion fades, and there had betterbe a lot of money to take its place!

I've learnt that 99% of the time when something isn't working in your house, oneof your kids did it.

I've learnt that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away...

Later!

‘Listen to your heart’

2008-06-05T17:05:00.003+05:30

Often we ignore what we ‘want’ to do for what we ‘should’ do. We never know who exactly defined the ‘should’ part. Yet we keep doing it. Overlooking the ‘want’ that we (so closely) personally identify with.

Listen to your heart- even if you would go wrong-there will be a sense of satisfaction....

‘Trust your Instinct’

2008-06-05T16:46:00.002+05:30

From- ‘should I date this person’ to ‘This guy stares at me often, in the office’; applies to all. Your instinct was developed over millions of years. It can never go wrong. You just need to identify it. So be it in any relationship, any situation if you have a ‘gut feel’ listen to it.

2008-05-28T15:48:00.002+05:30

One of the surest evidences of friendship that one individual can display to another is telling him gently of a fault.

If any other can excel it, it is by listening to such a disclosure with gratitude and amending the error.

Anilisms

2008-05-20T18:52:00.003+05:30

Today I am starting the first ever ‘regular’ posts on this blog. Though the regularity in its periodic sense is not defined. It will be regular in the sense that you may have the privilege to read them here- every now and then. In short- they’ll be chain or a series.

So much for the setting up of the plot. Let’s come to the crux now. What is ‘Anilism’ by the way? Difficult to define- yet I’ll try, haven’t got much choice here, have I? Often in our lives we come across moments, people, events, hardships, emotions, thoughts- anything that leaves a mark on our minds that may convert to ‘learning’. Anilism is not just a school of thought, in fact, is a way of living.

Also, accompanied by some witty statement from the ‘father himself’.

Watch out for the first Anilism in my next post...

Till Later,

Be good.

The Difference

2008-05-15T15:54:00.003+05:30

Money is so cheap! It's quite easy to payback. All you need is a bank account number and one click and you are done!

Had it been somethng else- it might have taken you ages just to think- what, on this earth, can I possibly do to return a favour viz. a shoulder to cry on, a heads up- while you were facing the last ball of the second innings and still needing three runs to win, or may be someone who gave you an ear while you wanted to run away- till the end of the earth or the one who counseled you when you were standing at the edge of the roof of one of the highest buildings in sight, with your hands sweating, heart pounding and head spining.

Now that would be tricky...right!?

Be good.

Relationships

2008-05-15T15:35:00.003+05:30

They are such a waste of time! they tire me- draining out all the positive energy from me. Isn't there a way out? Can I avoid them? Wish I could. And there are times when you put in so much and SWOOSH it goes! Why just get into one if this is the way it is supposed to be! Better wait for the one where there is no way back. Like in those puzzle games where the basic condition is that it is compulsary for atleast two people to be onboard at any given point in time.

Ha! Don't people really realize how much the other has done for them! Is it that difficult? I am often blamed to be overdoing it! I mean, appreciating even the smallest, of any, gestures! Sigh...that's me...

Later!

Delusion

2008-05-13T18:23:00.000+05:30

The past can be terribly deceptive. It’s like an old photograph. You see a smiling face, a loving arm around someone, and your eyes start glistening with unshed tears.I look so happy…Photographs can lie.They’re just images you create.Smiles can be faked.The past can delude.All because you want to believe.
Posted by kyra at 11:59 PM 6 comments

New

2008-05-13T18:00:00.002+05:30

New house, new room."New experience," they said, "learning new things is good."New place, new people.Hellos, goodbyes and high-pitched giggles."Did you just get in? Oh! Me too!"New clothes, new shoes.Itchy new labels and new band-aids on new blisters.I miss Old. I wonder if it misses me too.
Posted by wiseling at 1:01 PM 1 comments Links to this post
Labels: wiseling

Cigarettes and Love

2008-05-13T17:56:00.002+05:30

He smokes Marlboros. The first cigarette she ever smoked was a Benson and Hedges - Special Filter. So was the last. He kissed her after every cigarette. He said he loved the taste of cigarettes and her grape lip balm. He still smokes Marlboros. It probably wouldn't have worked anyway. The brands were all wrong.
Posted by wiseling at 1:01 PM 1 comments Links to this post
Labels: wiseling

2008-05-13T16:05:00.005+05:30

I cross my bridges when I come to them and burn them behind me, for nothing to show for my progress-except the memory of the smell of smoke and a presumption that once my eyes watered.

NYRs...

2008-03-05T10:43:00.005+05:30

I know the theory of making and keeping New Year resolutions doesn’t work. Making- Yes…keepin’…well…NO! Cuz if you really wanted to discard that ol’ annoying habbit of yours or take up a new ‘angelic’ (hey…nothin’ to do with Jolie here ;) if she was involved- probably you would keep it…eh?] one, you wouldn’t wait for even a moment, let alone a full year. Ha!

Sometimes I wonder why just 1st of Jan? Is it because it would make the math easier? To count from this date and hour that how long were you able to keep it! And again, if I really want to cultivate a good habit- why keep a count at all! Shouldn’t it just live with me till I am buried!

But yes, at least there is one day (whatever few moments from the whole day) for at least we have a noble thought! At least I had it somewhere deep down inside me to be good in whatever (social, ethical, moral, spiritual, health wise) way- so what if it doesn’t translate into action. Isn’t it a ‘battle won’ in itself that I got conscious about it?!

Just a thought about it has made a difference, but, of course, following it would make THE difference.

Ciao.

How despicable can we get...!!

2008-01-14T15:38:00.004+05:30

When we cheat someone...who are we actually cheating...??This is an important question that one should be asking to the self more often specially in the present times!I agree that in this fast moving world around us, I am talking about the wonderful-corporate-world here, where at every step one is forced to perform to stay in the race, the temptation to deceive may sometime overrule all the moral teachings for a moment.But then is it not our duty to overcome that and controle our minds for that moment!??

One instance:

One fine morning, employees of one of the top MNC are travelling through the Company provided conveyance. The conductor, probably an illeterate, is circulating a sheet of paper around so that the details of the employees availing the facility may be identified and the applicable deductions can be made from the salary.He doesn't know any employee personally,i.e, by names or employee IDs or the likes! Whatever one writes is the Bible for him!Now look at the degree of wickedness-two employees scribble some hypothetical names and IDs just to avoid paying about 500 bucks..!!And mind you they are the ones earning handsome salaries of around 20K..!!We wouldn't mind blowing up 3K to go to a disc or a club just for a night!We will convince ourselves by saying this was a need,there was a need of a nice break, this is not an extravagance...it's a necessity!Why do we behave so irrationally sometimes...??Why do we stoop the the levels where the others might find it difficult to call us 'human'!

A Completely different seen:

One girl about the age of 14yrs has been looking for an averagely build middle aged lady since three days now.The reason- she has to return the fifty paise she borrowed from the lady,one morning!

What a contrast..!!

Actually the question is...HOW this contrast...???

Till later...

Why do u always return.....

2007-12-19T09:56:00.003+05:30

Just walkin down this dusty road,

I had a thought striking my mind.

I don't need you to be in my life,

cuz all dat we do is have a strife.

Right when we both are going steadily,

you have to get up and break free.

Whenever we are going strong,

you always manage to break the bond.

An enigma bothering my mind,

why is it me tht you always find,

to break a heart and shatter the dreams,

and then return, saying u r sorry for me.

So why do you always return?

I was the one making the sacrifice,

shunning sanity and nurturing a vice,

of giving you all dat I had,

and standing up to the whole world.

It unleashes the freak in me,

when among everyone you rebuff me.

Whenever you get close to me,

my heart bleeds and Satan reigns supreme.

why do u do the things tht you do,

and keep on comin back to me.

So why do u always return?

This is NOT my composition- but this certainly relates in the most appropriate way right now! Thanks to the one who wrote this.

Help Me...please

2007-12-18T13:15:00.002+05:30

What on the earth are we running after? How are we supposed to trust a person? Is everything that we see for real? When can I be sure of anything? Has anyone done anything truly selfless in ones life? Is there anything called love? What does a promise mean? What is the limit of forgiveness?Is there a criteria to evaluate commitment? What should one do about split personalities and sexists? Can the smallest piece of a broken heart be seen from naked eye? Is there a medicine to cure confusion? What is the price of a Dream? How can one be sure who/ what is right for you? Is everything really fair in love and war and if YES then who made this rule? Who makes all the rules anyway? What is the peak of optimism? Why do we really crave for the things that are forbidden? Where is the format button in humans? Is there a hell/ heaven for the 'living-dead'?

:-(

Opportunities come to those who know what they want...

2007-04-16T14:39:00.002+05:30

Often we hear people talking about Mr./Ms. Right. But when you ask them to describe this person, we mumble a few adjectives-Understanding, smart, intellectual, luving, caring...And that's the end of the list.

For whatever reasons, we can never have a clear picture of that person in our minds. And that is the reason, mostly, that we are never able to make out even when he is right in front of us.

Having a well-defined list of attributes- for a Mr. Right may sound a little too 'un-romantic' or like a 'job-finder', however, it prepares you for finding him.

Here is a list that is segregated on the criteria- 'Must Haves'-Things that cannot be done without; 'Wish list'- that if there is taken as a bonus; and the 'Knockout Punches' that can lead anyone out of the game-right away.

MUST HAVES:

Someone smart and intellectually stimulating, who is compatible with me in that- he likes to talk about ideas.
Someone spiritual or interested in developing himself and a spiritual life.
A good person with a big heart, who is kind and luving.
Someone who takes care of his professional and financial life.
Someone who is committed to the relationship, who is willing to work on it.
Someone who is supportive of my goals & dreams and can be supportive when I have rough time or a bad day. Some one who is willing to TAKE support from me in return, who won't hide or run away when he needs support.
Someone who is passionate and has a zest for life.
Some one who is not fooled by my self-reliance and can see and accept my vulnerability.
Someone with a strong sense of integrity.

WISH LIST:

Someone who makes me laugh and has wit.
Someone who can get along with my friends and my family.
A good lover who can express himself be it physically or verbally- lovingly with consideration and openness.
Tall

KNOCK-OUT PUNCHES:

Someone who is a sexist- thinking it's okay to abuse/hit, taking out the frustration on her.
Someone who is unwilling to be open and communicative, who withdraws when problems arise, leaving me in the middle of the way.
Someone who doesn't like my family or whom my familt doesn't like.
Someone who doesn't value or maintain his friendships.
Someone I am not attracted to.

Well...that's the list for now...amendments are inevitable...!

Stay Good.

If Luv is a Game, these are the Rules...

2007-02-08T10:24:00.001+05:30

RULE ONE: You must luv yourself first.
Your relationship with yourself is the central template from which all others are formed. Loving yourself is a prerequisite to creating a successful and authentic union with another.

RULE TWO: Partnering is a choice.
The choice to be in a relationship is up to you. You have the ability to attract your beloved and cause the relationship you desire to happen.

RULE THREE: Creating luv is a process.
Moving from 'I' to 'WE' requires a shift in perspective and energy. Being an authentic couple is an evolution.

RULE FOUR: Relationships provide opportunities to grow.
Your relationship will serve as an unofficial 'life-shop' in which you will learn about yourself and how you can grow on your personal path.

RULE FIVE: Communication is essential.
The open exchange of thoughts and feelings is the life blood of your relationship.

RULE SIX: Negotiation will be required.

THere will be times when you and your partner must work through impasses. If you do this consciously and with respect, you will learn to create win-win outcomes.

RULE SEVEN: Your relationship will be challenged by change.

Life will present turns in the road. How you maneuver those twists and turns determines the success of your relationship.

RULE EIGHT: You must nurture the relationship for it to thrive.

Treasure your beloved and your relationship will flourish.

RULE NINE: Renewal is the key to longitivity.

Happily ever after means the ability to keep the relationship fresh and vital.

RULE TEN: You will forget all this the moment you fall in love.

You know all these rules inherently. The challenge is to remember them when you fall under the enchanting spell of love...!!!

Till the next post...stay lovely!

Coping with Difficult people...'part two'

2007-01-10T16:48:00.002+05:30

Okay...Long time..yeah??

So, as I promised in my last post that now I should talk about how to manage those weired categories of difficult people I mentioned last time.

I hope you still remember the categories...?? Don't worry, even if you don't remember you can always go and check out the last post again. :-)

We will take them one at a time...

Let's start with the Bullies:

"Self- Confidence" is the key.

Assess the situation
Stand up for yourself
Let them run down, i. e., let the bully say what ever they want to say, wait for the moment when they have no more fuel to burn
Don't make an eye contact with them, distract yourself
Make them sit down
Call them by some other name, if you talk to them by their first name call them by their surname or their pet name
Present your point
If still they are out of control, wait till they are done and leave
Come back with a bigger battle to win the war. Only unlucky people have perfect situations

Facing the Snippers:

If you remember, they are the passive aggressives, so:

Surface their attack
Openly ask them- "Why are you doing this to me?"
If you are in a group, take a poll about what opinion the majority has about who is being difficult.

Next, the exploders who are characterized as 'paranoids':

Ask them to "STOP!!!"
Ask them " Can you identify what you are talking about??"
Make them 'THINK"

In line are the not-so-harmful but a could-be-spoil-sport- the complainers:

Quiet often we find ourselves in this what-to-do situation when say 'A' complains to 'B' about 'C'. What should you do?

Ask them to write down the complain or whatever the trouble is.
When you listen- listen attentively
You intiate reasoning

The Super-agreeables:

Reinforce honesty- complement them when you think they gave their honest opinion and not just agreed for the sake of it
Be personal with them, i.e., let them say what they want in a group, ask them their opinion a little later again, when no one is around and then make them realise that they should have their honest say in front of everyone too.

When in conversation with a wet-blanket :

Avoid getting drawn into it
Stop arguing

And finally- the know-it-alls:

Make sure you have done your home work throughly
NEVER compete with them
Use questions, ask them the hows and the whys and the whos

By the time you reach this part of the post, you are a graduate in handling the difficult people...So congratulations!!! Hoever, if you might not have read carefully let me bring one point to your notice- I said a graduate and not a Master as mastery can come only through practice and experience!

But before you go off, let me give a word of caution- Do not judge people just on one instance.. you may mistake a wet-blanket for a know-it-all or something like that. So before 'coping' first make sure that you have got the right angle or it may back-fire!

And as once my mother told me- ' Excellence has always been achieved by those who dared to believe that something inside them is superior to the circumstances (and not the people)!

Till my next post...Believe in yourself...!!

Coping with DIFFICULT people...

2006-12-12T16:58:00.001+05:30

Almost everyday, some point in time, all of us have to cope with difficult people- be it a person younger to you or elder, your boss or a friend, a known or a stranger.And I say that one has to 'cope' as sometimes there is no escaping it.But what does coping mean?coping-in content with- peaceful war of existence.

First of all let's see what are the kinds of difficult people?

Based on the type of behaviour and degree of difficulty to handle them, they can be broadly classified into the following names:

Bullies

Snippers

Exploders

Complainers

Super Agreeables

Wet Blankets

Know it Alls

Now before you go guessing about these funny and a little too weired names let's get to know them one by one.

Bullies, as you might have guessed from the name, they treaten,frighten or/and scare you. Almost everyone of us might have come accross atleast one of them during our high school days...! They generally have a heavy build- like bulldozers!

Snippers are of the clever category. They can be termed as Passive-agressives. They throw balls at you when you are the weakest. say, when you are in a meeting. they might have some expertise or some knowledge or information that is only known to them. How often has this happened to you that you are in a meeting and you state something that is not complete and there the Snippers will throw questions at you and trying to guess won't be a good idea as they might have the information that they did not share with you outside the meeting-room as they were waiting for the right time.

It is quite difficult to recognize a Snipper as they keep hiding till the 'right time'!

Exploders are paranoids. They just explode! Anytime- Anywhere for no rhyme or reason. (ofcourse, this is the reason why we are talking about them as difficult people). There would be no meaning to what they speak once they are in the mode of-explosion! This is generally due to accumulation of anxiety. They think you are kids.

Now here is one category that the quality control departments of most of the companies would like to employ- the Complainers. They are generally perfectionists. So you are wondering what makes them difficult to handle?? Here is the answer- they abuse human compassion. They would complain just about anything and everything. If it is a cloudy day they'll complain, if it's sunny they'll complain. If there is work they'll complain, if there is no work they'll complain. They may be in the best of environments- they'll complain.

Super-Agreeables- hmmm..now here is a category that most of us would luv to have around us. How many times do we curse the person who cuts our point with something that has more weight. Now imagine if there was no one to contradict you...feels good eh..?? May be NOT! Infact, it is said "If two people in a business agree-there is no need of one of them!" Super-agreeables are self-conscious, uncomfortable, embarrased, insecure people. They would agree to just anything, no matter how silly it might be..!!

How would you feel if you are wrape\ped in a wet blanket? Ya, I can see that face you made! Wet blankets create problems all the time. Everytime you have a great idea, they'll come up with "you know it has already been done in the past...it's not a good one..." this-that what not!

The last but certainly not the least, a category that knows it ALL! From matters related from cooking to rocket-science! You start a talk and they would know all. Or at least the know-it-all have sometime or the other have already experienced the exact situation that you are talking about (and you say of course-history repeats itself). And if not them personally then it's one of their Aunt's colleague's sister-in-law's step-father!! But they know about it!!

Now, you say, such impossible people, how in the world can I even think about coping with them...?!! Well,well...well. As someone said "there is no problem without a solution and if there is then it is not a problem and just a fact that does not need to be solved but coped with." So all these difficult people are not problems but they are there and you are there too and you need to cope with them in order to survive.

Hmm..so how to survive...?? Well, wait for my next post...

Till later

Be good!

All the world may be a stage, but do only the goodlooking actors make it to the final act...??

2006-12-08T09:58:00.002+05:30

Everyone wants to look good, whatever their age,gender or personality. Okay, for some it's a requirement of their jobs like the showbiz people- VJs, actors, models and so on and the others in the business service industry like airlines, hotels and banks etc. But what about the rest of us? THere is obviously something about good looks that gives people an advantage? So why is looking good such a big deal? Here is how it goes:

We are programmed to react better to goodlooking people. And it starts right from when a baby is born. We respond enthusiastically to a cute baby and not towards a not so cute child. People who look good are liked more. And so because you want to be liked, you want to look good.

When you think "good-looking", who comes to your mind? Brad Pitt? Aishwarya? Hrithik Roshan? Or any other young style icon? Probably, how many of you thought of Sean Connery or Andrey Hepburn or someone of that age group? Few, if any. There is no escaping it. In our minds, goodlooks are equated with being young and fit. Beautiful= young. Which is why beautiful equals desirable. Watch a good looking guy/ girl walk into a room- everyone notices. And when an ordinary looker walks in, well, nothing. Since goodlookers get noticed easily others want to be seen with them as it brings them into attention. When choice is between two equally matched people, usually the betterlooking one is chosen.

You may think not, but there are actually some disadvantages to being good looking!

Look good and people automatically assume that you are empty in other departments.

If you are good looking, no one gives you credit for your achievements- they immediately attribute them to your looks. You have to work twice as hard to prove yourself.

Good lookers are never quite sure if they are being liked for themselves or for the way they look!

So if you are of the category that are highly pleasing to the eye, ear or mind- thanks to the God and your genes. And if not- never mind, after all if you can make a difference- you are the one who counts!!!

Stay Good.